Sunday, June 20, 2010

Sunday Morning Mass

This morning at church, I had to use my wheelchair, but I didn't mind so much. My partner was very careful not to bump or jolt my back or knees as he pushed me up the ramp into the church. St Mark Catholic Church is a friendly and evangelical church. I have many friends there, even though I might not know everyone by name, but they sure know me. I not sure if I'm the only Brit, at church or not, but I'm well known for many different things I think.  There is one thing I'm sure of, there are non-American citizens at church. My dear friend Chela wasn't an American citizen for a while. She became one about 18months to 3 years ago.

Anyhow, lets get back to the matter at hand, when happened to me during church, mass. Once in the chapel, I sat there hoping for the immense pain I was having in my knee and lower back. Wondering if God was going to give me a vision or be silent. At 9:50am, mass had began and I was enjoying the choir and closed my eyes and started to pray for healing . Not complete healing, but just to allow me to get through mass and lower my pain level a little, not much to ask. Instead of my pain getting better, it got way worse. I felt that asking for relief of pain, was the wrong thing to ask for.

I sat back in my wheelchair and just enjoyed my time, and deal with the pain. I  was enveloped by dark black cloud. everything was dark, I couldn't even see my partner any longer. This was scary and I was terrified of what was going on. I squeezed my eyes shut, saying a little prayer in the silence of my heart. Nothing changed, why I wasn't sure. Wanting to move, but I was no longer in my wheelchair. I was sitting in a chair, a nice comfy chair. In front of the chair was a desk and in front of the desk, was a massive line of children and their parents, this is what I assumed.  I was signing books, On the desk was a picture of a girl holding a bible, with the title Renewal of faith on the picture. I knew then I was being shown my future. Why I wasn't completely sure?

All I knew, God and his Angels were showing me my future. I then was sitting in my wheelchair and Eucharist was starting. After I took of the Eucharist, and closed my eyes and prayed. Thanking God and his Angels for showing me what I believe to be my future. I now know that my writing is a gift from God and I'll be bringing his children to him, via my writing.

Poem - I'm a Survivor

That moment when I heard the door closing behind with all my memories inside, my heart stopped beating. I can't remember how I made it t...